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Children’s Behavior/Developmental issues. Introduction
Like adults, children can have problems too. In fact, the National Mental
Health Association estimates that between 12 and 17% of all children and
teens in the United States are dealing with an emotional or mental health
problem at any given time. They also estimate that up to 7% of these young
people have disorders that are serious enough to need treatment. Yet many
families don't seek treatment for their child or teen for a variety of
reasons. Families feel shame, stigma and loss. The loss is the most important
factor because they loose precious time with their children when they
postpone treatment. There is no shame to having a child with mental, behavioral or emotional
disorders. While many popular theories about the origin of children's
disorders point to parents as the cause, none of these theories are backed
up by science. In fact, the scientific research has told us is that the
origin of children's disorders is complicated. Experts in the fields of
mental health, medicine and psychiatry even disagree among themselves.
There is no one single, common factor that causes children's disorders.
Biology, genetics, environment and developmental factors all may play
a role in the child's disorder. Families do share one thing. They want the same thing that all parents
want. They want their child to grow up to be happy and successful and
to reach his or her dreams. What Are Children’s Disorders? As children grow and develop, they move through a range of behaviors at each developmental stage. Most two-year-olds share certain behaviors that are considered normal for their age group. On the other hand, a twelve-year-old who displays these same behaviors would be suspected of having a behavioral or emotional problem. Generally, when a child or teen shows behaviors that are not considered normal for his or her age, this will draw the attention of parents, teachers or others who have contact with them. Abnormal or unusual behavior falls into four categories:
Abnormal or unusual behavior spans a range from mild to severe, as do children’s disorders themselves. One child’s behavior can be a temporary response to a crisis in his or her life, with few negative consequences. Yet another child will need long-term supports and treatment. Each child is individual. Developmental Stages of Children Childhood is a time of change. Therefore it is important to evaluate your child’s mental health taking into consideration the emotions and behavior that are appropriate for your child’s age. It is also important to understand what is going on in your child’s environment. Family issues, problems at school and conflicts with peers can all affect your child’s mental health. The range of what is considered ‘normal’ is wide. Parents compare their child to other children of the same age. All children are unique and reach developmental milestones at different times. That’s why it’s unwise to compare your child to another child. By the same token, it’s important to listen to your instincts. Many parents who are raising a child with mental health issues report that their child showed problems early on, even when their doctors reassured them. If you are uneasy about how your child is developing or behaving, talk to your pediatrician. You know your child better than anyone. Your doctor only sees your child for a few minutes during a doctor’s visit. You live with your child 24 hours a day. In order to understand if your child has a mental health problem that would benefit from treatment, you need to have an understanding of what is considered ‘normal’ for children at various developmental stages. You also need to be aware that as your child grows and develops, her behavior, attitude, learning and relationships change. The following is only a general guide to the developmental stages of children. Your pediatrician is the best source of information. And don’t forget to trust your instincts. Developmental Stages of Infants & Children Infancy (0 to 1 ½ years old.) Your baby begins to connect with the world around her. Babies will start to communicate with the people around them as early as 1 month old. Your baby interacts with her caregivers by smiling and imitating facial expressions. She shows pain, anger, fear and frustration by crying. Somewhere about 12 to 18 months, most children begin saying their first words. Babies also begin to walk about this time, although a few babies who are perfectly normal may begin walking and talking earlier or later. Toddlers - (18 months to 3 years old) About 18 months, children become more independent and more opinionated. Your toddler is gaining a sense of selfhood and he expresses his emotions much more intensely. He will scream with delight when happy and throw temper tantrums when he is angry, frustrated, or wants his way. His physical development is maturing and he may be able to jump, run easily, feed himself, kick balls and throw things. His toilet training is usually complete sometime in the third year, although he may still have accidents. He knows he is a separate person, and can refer to himself by name. During this stage of development, he begins to develop social skills, and can play with other children for short periods of time. Preschool (4 to 5 years old) Your child’s large motor skills will continue to develop (running, jumping, climbing, throwing) as will her fine motor skills (using her hands to draw, paint, use scissors, tie shoes). Your preschooler’s vocabulary will usually have about 1,300 words. She begins to understand time concepts. She also knows how to group objects by similarity (color, function). Preschoolers have a strong need for friends and like to be around older children. They begin to understand the difference between right and wrong, and are interested in rules. They like to boast and may have imaginary friends. Preschoolers begin developing more sophisticated social skills. She will like to please adults, can share, loves to role-play, and is beginning to understand the difference between truth and lies. School age (6 to 12 years old) Children at this age begin to think logically and solve problems. Your child will learn to read and write. Many children may start a collection, which requires classifying objects. There is a gender division at this age, where boys and girls play separately. At this age, peers begin to criticize other peers for being different. Peers become the standard for behavior. They can express their feelings freely. They are sensitive to criticism and ridicule and worry about their friend’s opinions of them. Sometimes they are moody and unpredictable. They begin to make value judgements, set standards for themselves, and accept responsibility. They still see their parents as perfect or infallible. The
Teen Years This is the age when children first start to move toward independence. Their bodies begin to change physically and they feel awkward or strange about themselves and their bodies. This is also an age that is characterized by moodiness. Young teens are easily influenced, sensitive to criticism, and blow simple events out of proportion. They may be easily provoked, and feel self-conscious about their changing bodies. They are much better at expressing themselves, and can use words to describe their feelings. They begin to see parents as imperfect. They show less affection to parents, and at times, may be overtly rude to parents. They start to test the limits of rules. They model their behavior based on their friends. They are intolerant of those outside of their peer group and those who are different than their peer group. High school Teens at this age are developing the skills they need to solve real life problems. Often, they may seem detached and uninvolved. They are loyal to friends, they need friends. Some teens may want total independence, but are rarely capable of it. They want to explore moral and ethical issues that confront them and are very reflective about their thoughts and feelings. Older teens have the ability to express a wide range of feelings. They can easily swing from childish behaviors to being serious and grown-up. They see parents as old fashioned and unsophisticated, which helps them establish the courage to assert their independence. They may even leave home for a few days to continue the search for ‘who I am.’ They begin developing true empathy as their concern for others increases. Peer relationships remain important and take an appropriate place among other interests. They begin showing a greater capacity for setting goals, using insight. There is an increased emphasis on personal dignity and self-esteem. They begin gaining an appreciation for social and cultural traditions. Late High school (18 +) Although our society views young people over 18 as adults, they still have a great deal of developmental work to do. At this age, they face serious decisions about the course of their future. They are sometimes absorbed in themselves, searching for answers about what to do with their lives. They have a strong desire to become dependent on themselves, but may be confused and frightened about their unknown future. They often deal with hard moral and ethical questions and worry about their emotional health. They miss their family, as they are planning to leave home (military, college, etc.). They may establish a long term, close relationship (shared household, long courtship, early marriage.) As a result of the major developmental
changes that are happening in the teen years, they are often filled with
conflict in the family. Parents may be frustrated and angry that the teen
seems to no longer respond to parental authority. Methods of discipline
that worked well in earlier years may no longer have an effect. And, parents
may feel frightened and helpless about the choices their teen is making.
Parents also may feel a sense of loss as their teen ‘leaves the nest.’
Dealing with the issues of adolescence
can be trying for all concerned. But families are generally successful
at helping their children accomplish the developmental goals of the teen
years -- reducing dependence on parents, while becoming increasingly responsible
and independent. In other words, most kids grow up just fine. Treatment works and can put your teen back on track. How do you know? Here are some warning signs that should not be ignored:
As a parent, you know your teen better than anyone else does. If you suspect that your teen is in need of professional help, and is exhibiting any of the signs listed above, contact a mental health professional who specializes in treating adolescents. |
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